I started lockdown last year with 5 boxes of cigars. My plan was that when I got down to one box I would start trying to get more cigars. When I got down to one box, I asked myself, “what would happen if I just ran out?” So I smoked the last box of cigars and ran out. Nothing happened. That was April of last year, April of this year was one year tobacco free.
But I still crave tobacco. When I smell it it smells so good. It would be nice if I could smoke just a little bit, But I’m the kind of addict who chain smokes or doesn’t smoke at all.
The other morning, I had just finished my exercises and I was walking the dogs and somebody rode by on a bicycle. It was early morning, still dark, and the guy was smoking a cigarette. I thought to myself, “I’m glad I don’t have to smoke this early in the morning”. It’s possibly my first anti tobacco thought since I quit. That bicycle smoker kind of put me off tobacco.
But still, I like the ritual of tobacco. The clipping of the cigars, the filling of the tobacco pipe. The lighters and all the paraphernalia. Many of my friends were friends because we smoked cigars together. I don’t see a large group of my friends anymore because we aren’t on the same places together.
Pluses and minuses.
Tobacco is the perfect addiction. It doesn’t get you high, it doesn’t alter your mind, it has no effect except the desire for more.
Have a great day.