Do you have a lot of friends? I do. I have friends I work with, I have friends I scuba dive with, I have friends I go to dinner with on Friday nights. I have friends “in the program”.
Friends as an adult seems different than friends I had when I was a child in school. With school friends, we would hang out after dinner and before dinner. We would talk on the phone 100 times a day. We were constantly in each other’s lives.
Somewhere along the line things changed,we’re friends, but there’s a distance, a subtle boundary, almost undetectable.
Years ago, my wife and I had an argument and she called her friends and I was painfully aware that I had nobody to call. Now, with this divorce going on, it never feels “right” to talk to my “friends” about it. If I do, I don’t feel good about it afterwards. Like some topics don’t fit in the “category” of our friendship. I feel like my only option is to talk to a stranger like a counselor, someone who is paid to do a job. And that doesn’t always do the trick either, I don’t get the connection, I don’t get whatever’s missing because the counselor or stranger doesn’t know the back story story, doesn’t know me, doesn’t know the people involved.
There’s lots of quotation marks in this post…
I guess I’m asking if you feel the same way? Do our friends and friendships get different as we get older? What changes? I’m thinking it has something to do with the creation of a new family, which I feel like I have lost recently.
Anyway, happy Wednesday have a good day!