I went a couple of months, and every time I typed in one of those word verification things I got it right the first time. I thought I was getting used to it or something. Now, all of a sudden, I can’t get them right again. I make absolutley certain and still get it wrong. I gotta say, that word verification is the worst thing about blogger. Other places have 3 characters, or just a word. What is this underwater melted letter crap that Blogger thinks they have to use? It’s annoying.
I woke up early this morning. 4:30. I layed there awhile but got up before the alarm. I did some situps and worked out a little with dumbells I bought not too long ago. In my brain, I weighed 175 pounds since high school. Then, for 6 months exactly, in 2003, I took antidepressants and gained weight. I went up to 200 pounds. I’ve always been the type who could never gain or loose weight, so I thought. A couple of months ago, I was looking at my old scuba cards, and saw that when I got certified (in 1981) I weighed 160. So much for 175 since high school, I’m delusional, lying to myself. So I have slowly, imperceptibly been gaining weight. And I bet it’s going to be hard to loose. I want to go down to 180. This crap of coming home, “just for a second” then staying has got to go. My self discipline has gone in the gutter. I used to walk the beach, the whole Seven Mile Beach, every weekend. I seldom do that any more. Lame whining that I can’t find a dive buddy. Also I notice that I started sitting around at night, surfing the net or watching a movie, eating chips and crap and I’m not even hungry. Standing in front of the fridge, aware I’m not hungry, but wanting something to eat, just for something to do. All this will change. You read my blog and think I go to the beach a lot, but nowhere near as much as I used to. I used to live there. for years, I swam every day before work. (then I quit after I was swimming in total darkness and got stung in the face by a jellyfish and had to call an ambulance for myself). So anyway, my behavior has changed, and I think if I change it back things will get better.